Hair - good, bad and ugly

So I got my hair cut last week.

My stylist took off 4 inches.

This was a mildly traumatic event for me because it represented change and once I got past 40, I discovered I do not embrace change with the same enthusiasm I used to.

But when it came to hair, I really needed a change. I tend to get in hair style ruts and once I find something that works, it’s hard to convince me to change. Nope. Not good with change at all. Don't even get me started on my continuing quest to find the perfect hair color.

It was all Jamie’s fault. Again.

Seriously. The Big Red Dog has had more impact on my hair style (or lack thereof) over the last 12 1/2 years than any vagaries of fashion.

When I got Jamie in the fall of 1999, I had long wavy hair that spent most of its life in a pony tail because I wasn’t really given to messing with it. You say “styling.” I say “messing.”

Jamie was a very cuddly puppy (12 1/2 years later, at 60 pounds, he’s still very cuddly) and I spent a lot of time holding him in my arms. He would snuggle up, put his muzzle under my ear, then with a quick snap and grab, he would yank the scrunchie right out of my pony tail. OUCH! A little of that went a long way.

That was the first inspiration to get my hair cut short. I went short. Shorter. Shortest. I look at our HIT pic from Terv nationals in 2004 and holy buckets, I think my hair was shorter than the Farmer’s!

Then a year ago, when Jamie was so sick and we were still chasing the IBD diagnosis, I was overdue to have my hair trimmed but during that horrible month, it seemed like all I had time for were trips to the emergency vet. Once things settled down and Jamie was on the mend, my very short hair had gone into business for itself. It didn’t look too bad. It looked okay. In fact, I kind of liked it. OMG, I wanted long hair again. What was I thinking?

And so I spent the next 12 months growing out my short layers. Fortunately, I’m one of those people who has relatively fast growing hair. There were a few months that were kind of scary (have you ever seen gravity defiant layers being grown out? I swear they were growing horizontally, NOT a good look) but by January of this year, I had shoulder length hair again.

I liked it. For about a week.

Then it made me crazy. It was everywhere it shouldn’t be. It was in my face. It was in my mouth. I’m used to picking dog hair out of everything - my breakfast, my toothbrush, the refrigerator - and it doesn’t bother me a bit but I drew the line at picking HUMAN hair out of the same things. Ewww. Yuck. Gross.

And so the crisis begin. I needed short hair again.

How short? What style? Go back to the short layers? But I’d had that style for years. Try something new? Oh lord, change. I can’t deal. My co-workers were very helpful, offering suggestions on styles that would be “adorable” and “super cute.”

Hmmm. I’m not really an adorable, super cute kind of gal.

When all was said and done, my stylist cut my now-all-one-length-no-longer-layered hair in a bob. Okay. Fine. Good. Low maintenance. Cute enough for who it’s for.

Then she started with the hair goop. Oops, product. She moussed, gelled, scrunched, spritzed and blow dried on the lowest, slowest speed I’ve ever seen a hair dryer produce. I’m used to blasting my head with my trusty old Conair on high. It could blow a pomeranian off a grooming table. More hair goop. More spray. More scrunching.

In the time it took her to style this new cut, I could have taken the dogs out, fed them, showered, dressed and eaten breakfast.

The result was . . . um . . . amazing. I was impressed. Truly. It looked super. It didn’t move. I could have gotten hit by a tornado and that hair would not have moved a fraction. It was kind of scary on a lot of different levels.

There was no way in hell I was going to be able to replicate that look the next morning. But then, I didn’t plan on spending more than five minutes on it, either.

That was a week ago. I’ve mastered slooooow blow drying to retain natural curl and ventured into minimal application of hair goop and the results are acceptable. I’ll probably stick with this style for awhile. I really don’t want to have to deal with change again.